The Word of mAn[S]o0r: Chai paani...?

Known as chai paani, mithai (loved that one) and the most recent incarnation i heard.. 'daana paani', the cash under the table never ceases to amaze me at the sheer amount of work it can get done!

My first and foremost experience of people 'asking' for a bribery was with Karachi Police when my stolen car was recovered. I get a call in the afternoon from this policeman asking me if it was indeed my car with engine number so n so and chasis number so n so. When i confirmed it here is his reply

Sir! Buhut mubarak ho aapko! Aap kee gaari mil gaye hai humhe XXX thanay kay pass. Aap aakar lejaayein apney gaari. Aur iss khushi mein mithai lete aayega
(Translation: Congratulations! We've found your car from the jurisdiction of XXX station. Please come and collect your car and being dessert)

Being the naive and excitable kid that i was back then.. i actually contemplated getting a box of mithai for the policewala's like i had seen people take to each others home! What did i know that by mithai they meant cash! LoL! I even asked the policeguy once i had reached his station if there was any mithai shop near by. I still remember the funny expression he had on his face then.. (thinking maybe i was asking for an ATM machine? i'd never know). Anyway, after repeatedly being asked for mithai by a variety of policewala's did it dawn upon me that they were asking for a bribe! The fact that i had about Rs. 200 in my pocket at the moment also didnt help. Thankfully though, through applying some pressure's from their superiors.. i managed to get my car released from their custody at a mere Rs. 1200. (yes... i was given the directions to the ATM machine eventually. lol).

At that time.. the going rate's for getting recovered car's released from police custody (unless you have high connections) were something like this.
small old car - Rs. 5,000-7,000
small new car - Rs 10,000-15,000 (this was the category mine fell in)
big old car - Rs. 25,000-30,000
big new car - Rs. 40,000-50,000

Otherwise, they impound your car, and you get it through the court system. That costs pretty heavily both in terms of money and time.

Oh yea.. what prompted me to write this post at this moment!! Before i forget! I took my car to the suzuki showroom to get fixed, the service manager told me that it'll take about 10 days to be fixed since they had a lot of load. Given previous experiences of waiting 10-15 days extra, from whatever time they gave... i decided to take the proactive approach, trying to get the guy to do the work early for me. That's where i got the line

Mere saab, bachon (workers) ko daana paani milay ga, to khushi say kaam karein gay aur jaldi kaam karein gay, warna to aapko pata hai kitna time lagta hai innkaamon mein
(Translation: Sir, if the workers get a little incentive, then they'll work fast and happily on your car, since you know how much time these things take).

I agree'd to his proposal, and my car is now ready in 3 (thats right THREE) days!! Im getting it back tomorrow! And if any of my reader turns out to be a staunch muslim turning their nose down to giving a bribe, i'll say to you what i said to an office colleage on the issue. "I'll probably end up in hell anyway, atleast i get to drive in peace while im on earth."

Good night karachi!

Labels: my car, speaking out, thoughts